My husband, Ron, really enjoys coaching our little guy's baseball, football, and soccer teams, and lately, he's noticed more stay-at-home and work-at-home dads on the sidelines after school.

And, at work, I also seem to notice an increasing number of moms going back to work full-time while their husbands stay at home with the kids. It's fantastic that so many families are figuring out flexible ways to juggle "being the breadwinner" and caring for their loved ones.

According to a recent article on the parenting community Babble.com, there has been a 62% rise in single father households from 1990 to 2003, and the number of stay-at-home dads in the U.S. last year had risen to 159,000 (2.7% of the country's total number of stay-at-home parents), according to an article by the Washington Post.

Both media outlets point out, however, that these statistics ignore the number of work-from-home parents, or parents working part-time, contributing to the ever-changing dynamics of this new style of American parenting.

Two dads who took note of this changing parenting landscape, where families strive for balance, flexibility, and pragmatism over traditional gender roles, were Tom Perrotta, author of the best-selling novel Little Children (as well as the film adaptation starring Kate Winslet, Patrick Wilson, and Jennifer Connelly), which features a stay-at-home dad as a central character, and Dana Glazer, a filmmaker currently producing a documentary called The Evolution of Dad, following the history of fatherhood and gender equality in parenting from the 1950s to the present.

So, what does this new dad look like? And, is he really taking on the traditional "mommy" role?

"Todd [the stay-at-home dad in Little Children] was a sort of idealized figure, almost the embodiment of the fantasies of the stay-at-home moms at the playground," Tom Perrotta said. "I wanted him to be a nurturing father who was completely masculine…He's a new figure, but not yet an archetype, because the role is still in process. We haven't really figured out what to make of stay-at-home dads yet."

And Dana Glazer agreed, that stay-at-home dads are just a tiny fraction and sub-culture representing what is a much more radical change in the way families are operating these days and handling their approach to child care and childrearing.

"Stay at home dads, at least from my perspective, are a total novelty and something that’s been going on since the early 90s," Dana said. "Typically the stories are fluffy: they claim that [stay-at-home dads] are growing in numbers; and then there's a citation from the Census Bureau; and then there's always the references to the movies Mr. Mom or Daddy Day Care. My perspective on [this trend] is that on the surface, it's progressive, but underneath that, it's the status quo—just a flip in the traditional gender role. You get traditional dads who glance at it and go "ICK!" And you get feminists that say, "Yes! That's it. That's great." But the larger issues at hand, like gender equity and work-family balance, are largely ignored. I think the world is better off not just with one parent at home, but for the kids to get to know both parents. In the best possible world, you have the kids interacting with both parents as much as possible. What my kids get from my wife is very different from what they get from me, and kids are so stimulated by that different kind of interaction. The more the typical gender roles blend, the better. And I think that is happening, but it’s still pretty traditional overall. The stay-at-home dad phenomenon is great, but it tends to overshadow the real progress."

Both men have been work-at-home dads for the majority of their kids' lives, and they both had some pretty strong opinions on why this changing parenting dynamic has come about—and the challenges it also presents both for companies and for couples.

"The obvious answer is feminism—when a woman has a high-paying, rewarding career, why should she have to give up her job to care for the kids?" Tom said. "Why can't the father do the child care, especially if his job isn't so rewarding or lucrative? More and more couples are finding themselves in an economic situation where it seems like the most sensible thing is for the mother to keep working and the father to take over the home front."

But it's not quite as simple as that, as Dana pointed out.

"Women can be territorial around the maternal ground and just push the dads back off to work," Dana said. "A lot of divorces happen because of it, and it's important for couples to really talk about it before the kid is born. What's going to happen? Who's going to do what? And if you don't talk about it, everyone just falls back into those traditional roles. Women are getting the message, "You can do anything! You can do it all!" And if you don't talk about it, a lot of guilt and resentment can come into play. The big picture is how you get all these parts working together, and it's not easy. It takes a lot of discipline to do these things…Fatherhood is really important and we're really making strides, but you start to see that things really haven't progressed as much as we'd like to think we have."

Are you a work-at-home or stay-at-home dad, or do you have a spouse who is? We'd love to hear from you! Share your experiences with the Care.com community by posting a comment below.

It's back-to-school time again and I'm really excited! On weekends, I spend a few hours developing a supplemental curriculum for my little guy.

A few of my friends tell me I'm hard core, but he doesn't really get homework yet and I'd love for him to get back into the habit of doing some work after school. It's actually become one of my favorite hobbies, and allows me to get more involved with my son's education. Plus, with email, it's now so much easier to coordinate with his teachers on what he's learning at school and at home with me. 

Last summer, I blogged about creating fall activities and traditions for you and your children. Check out these two previous posts to get started today:

Back to School Guide

Planning for Fall Activities

Also, check out two of my personal favorites for educational activities with my little guy:

• Singapore Math. This is a great program for teaching children math, either for homeschooling or as a supplement to public or private education.

• The Word Ladder series These books are great for teaching kids to read words. My little guy really learned to sound out consonants and vowels with their fun games.

Please check back over the next couple of weeks, too: as we get farther into the school year, I'll be blogging more on developing a supplemental curriculum for kids.

Do you have tips or tricks of your own for getting the kids (and yourself) ready for the school year? Or favorite fall activities for the whole family?

Share them with the Care.com community by posting a comment!

Check out CBSnews.com today to watch the video of my interview with the Early Show!

**Update: Here's the direct link to the video segment.

As some of you may have read in my blog or newsletter last week, I was recently interviewed by the CBS team about saving money on child care this summer.

Do you have creative ways to save on child care that we didn't cover? Share them with the Care.com community by posting a comment!

Recently, I was talking about Facebook and MySpace with my older son, Ryan, and my nieces, and they expressed—in particular—how much they dislike adults (like their parents!) hanging out online in the same places they and their friends do.

I asked them how they'd feel if future employers were also viewing their Facebook or MySpace profiles,
which made them even more uncomfortable. They still feel their personal lives are private. Even on the internet. And then I realized that many of these teens and twentysomethings are also candidates for babysitting and nanny jobs.

Would you research your caregiver online? Would you view their MySpace profile, become their Facebook friend, or read their blog?

Several newspapers have written about this trend since social media outlets like blogs and MySpace entered the online scene around 2005.

Here are two that I really liked:

The New Nanny Diaries Are Online
By Helaine Olen for The New York Times' "Modern Love" column

This column follows the story of one mom who chose to begin reading her nanny's blog, and the ensuing drama and difficult choices that followed.

Finding Babysitters, from Craig's List to MySpace
By Heather Pemberton Levy, founder and editor of the blog MommyTruths

This blog post retells the story of how one mom found out through a sitter's MySpace profile that she definitely was not the right fit for her family.

Have you read your nanny's blog, or viewed your babysitter's Facebook or MySpace profile? Would you ever ask them to connect online as a "friend"? What did you think the article from the New York Times?

Share your thoughts, opinions, and experiences with the Care.com community by posting a comment!

Recently, the Early Show team from CBS News visited our offices in Waltham to learn more about our tips for cost-saving child care options this summer. Something I think we all need right about now. :)

Over the past few months, many of our members have written in with concerns over the rising cost of child care during this economy. According to the National Association of Child Care Resource and Referral Agencies (NACCRRA), Americans are now spending an average of $8,000 per year (nearly $700 a month) for child care for babies and toddlers. And everyone, including nannies and babysitters, is hard-pressed to budget these days—with wage workers also being forced to raise their hourly rates just in order to get by.

Recently, I've blogged about several topics around getting creative and devising a care plan that works for your budget and your family's individual needs, plus our editorial team here at Care.com has created some fantastic how-to guides for parents who are trying to determine the right rates of pay for their babysitter or nanny.

Check out these Care.com blog posts and articles for more tips on:

Affordable Child Care Options for Summer

Family Members as Caregivers

Child Care Costs: Paying a Nanny

We're Going Out—How Much Do I Pay My Sitter?

Do you have a creative way of saving on child care costs that we didn't cover? Share it with the Care.com community by posting a comment.

And, check back later this week for the video link to my interview on the Early Show!

Cheers,

Sheila

What a great summer we’re having so far! We've been enjoying the outdoors as a family: throwing the football around in the yard; walking; gardening; and swimming. Our little guy is loving it.  :)

We sometimes forget, however, to put on sunscreen and insect repellent, or to bring enough water on our walks. And, sadly, a friend of mine recently was diagnosed with Lyme disease. It’s important to be cautious about summer hazards like these.

Check out these blog posts for warm-weather safety tips for the whole family—pets, too!—and be sure to check in with elderly neighbors and relatives regularly:

Summer Health Concerns for Kids

Summer Health Concerns for Seniors

Summer Health Concerns for Pets

Have tips of your own for keeping your family safe, happy, and healthy in the heat and humidity? Share them with the Care.com community by posting a comment!

Good friends of ours in California just had a baby, and they're worried about the transition for their dog, Button, who's gotten used to being the "only child." It really got me thinking about this trend, where couples are first putting pets at the center of their nuclear family and deciding to have kids later.

Sound familiar?

In his recent book, Dogs, published by DK's Eyewitness Guides, veterinarian Dr. Bruce Fogle commented on this growing phenomenon:

"We live in an era where couples are choosing to have children later on in their lives," Dr. Fogle wrote. "Increased work, commitments, spiraling housing prices, cohabiting, and a general increase in the cost of living often mean that kids can be put on hold. Women may decide to wait until their late thirties to have their own children and, in the absence of the "real thing," the family dog takes on increased significance. It may be treated just like a child; partners in relationships often encourage their dogs to participate in as many aspects of their daily life as possible, including jogging, hiking, even dining with them, and thus create a family unit. The emergence of confident urban gay communities has also created a new sector of dog owners. Almost invariably, couples who don't have children are honest with themselves and their vets when they acknowledge that dog ownership adds glue to their relationships, a common bond, something that both individuals can embrace and care for." (pages 47-48)

Jessica Williams, a Care.com member and the proud mom of two strapping sons, ages two and four, and three happy and well-adjusted dogs, adds her veteran advice for getting the animals ready.

"Don't let the dogs get away with anything," Jessica says. "We stuck our fingers in all the places the kids would—the dogs' ears, eyes, food bowls—tugged their tails, and pet-proofed the areas the baby would be spending the most time, like the couch and floors. Our vet told us that getting rid of dog and cat hair where the baby would be laying or playing was also really important."

Jess and her husband, Luke, their Golden Retriever, Oakley, their Rottweiler-German Shepherd mix, Daisy, and their Cocker Spaniel, Olivia, plus two cats, lived happily for many years before children entered the picture. Once the kids become toddlers, Jess said it was also important for her sons to start learning about pet care responsibilities, and for the dogs to start understanding the kids' place in the food chain—literally.

"We let the kids start feeding the dogs on their own around age two. When we get up in the morning, the boys scoop the dogs' food and put down their water bowl. They love it, and the dogs have more respect for the boys as little "masters."

There are also a plethora of expert guides out there to help with the transition from "family of three" to traditional family. Each celebrity pet trainer has their own specific advice on gradually re-training your dog and getting him used to the new routines and impending chaos of having a baby around the house, and it's also important to gauge your dog's own unique personality and breed temperament.

Check out our editors' favorites:

DogSpeak by Bash Dibra

"Go back to basics and reinforce obedience and simple commands…Later, these commands allow [the dog] to lie quietly at her owner's feet as she feeds the baby, creating additional bonding between [dog] and baby and making [the dog] protective of this new, helpless creature…The dog will catch on, acting as "nanny" and alerting mom to baby's needs and cries." (pages 235-237, on pet preparations during pregnancy and afterwards)

Be the Pack Leader by Cesar Milan and Melissa Jo Peltier

"Remain in control of the dog…and never let the [child] make the first move, [paying] special attention to their behavior (excited, nervous, etc.) If the child's energy just doesn't seem right to you, or if the dog just isn't in the mood, wait. Don't risk it." (pages 263-264, on introducing your dog to a child or a stranger)

Have you gone through the transition from dog as "only child" to having real children? Please share your thoughts and experiences with the Care.com community by posting a comment!

And, for more information on preparing your pets for your baby's arrival, check out this fantastic article, Pets and Babies, by Care.com contributing writer Christine Koh, of BostonMamas.com.

A good friend recently told me that she won't hire "good looking" babysitters. She didn't feel comfortable with the idea, and when asked if it was because there were issues at home, she said: "There aren't any issues, which is why I don't hire them."

I'm pretty sure she was joking, but also realize that every couple and family has their own dynamic. Most people do want to see what their potential nanny looks like before meeting them for an interview. But, is there a fine line between hiring someone who's pleasing to the eye and someone who's potentially going to cause problems in your relationship? It seems that some people, like my friend, would just rather not take the risk. Is hiring an attractive babysitter or nanny to look after your kids an issue for you?

There are plenty of examples out there to justify this paranoia, of men and women cheating on their spouses with the babysitter or nanny, especially in Hollywood—movies like The World According to Garp, Spanglish, and The Sound of Music revolve at least in part around this theme, and celebrities like Jude Law, Rob Lowe, and Ethan Hawke have been attacked by the media as virtual poster boys for the phenomenon.

But, are our fears valid? Or are we just being manipulated by fictional situations and the fickle Hollywood elite?

Take our quick poll on Care.com, called Your Thoughts, and check back for the results—or post your own stories and opinions right here on my blog!

Last month, the Care.com team joined over a thousand volunteers and fellow Bostonians for a day of service with City Year's annual Serv-a-thon. We worked on revitalizing an urban community garden, and it was a great day of weeding, cleaning, building benches, and painting murals—even in the scorching heat!

My favorite part about it, though, was that our kids all got to experience community service firsthand, and came away with understanding of what it is to give back to their community and to the environment.

For green-themed projects your entire family can enjoy while caring for our planet—not just during City Year, but all year—check out my list of favorites:

• GARDENING
  Ron and I spend as much time as possible in our garden, and love it when the kids want to help out and learn about growing. Get your kids involved by planting a tree, repotting plants or flower beds with organic soil or mulch, or grow veggies and fruit from seeds in repurposed containers to learn about germination and caring for different kinds of plant life.

• PAINTING
  Make a mural with low-VOC, milk or clay paints, or sand and seal a bench or picnic table instead of buying a new one—saving the planet and money!

• TRASH PICK-UP
  Pick up trash around your neighborhood, local park or woods, or local stream, lake, or beach.

• RECYCLING
  Visit a recycling center as a "field trip", and set up recycling programs at home or at school.

• ENERGY EFFICIENT LIGHTS
  Change light fixtures at home to LED or incandescent bulbs, and teach kids about the importance of turning off lights, appliances, and other plug-in devices when not in use to save energy.

• SAVE GAS, GET EXERCISE
  Walk, bike, or take public transportation instead of driving, and teach kids about the impact of fuel on the global economy.

• REUSABLE BAG CRAFTS
  Decorate hemp or organic cotton bags for use at the supermarket, or make your own out of old T-shirts, sheets and pillowcases.

• SAVE WATER
  Inside, teach kids to turn off the faucet and limit running water when brushing teeth, showering, or washing dishes. Outside, install a rain catch for use in the garden—and summer sprinkler fun! Teach kids about the effects of water conservation, especially in areas prone to drought.

• ALL-NATURAL BUGS-BE-GONE
  Make homemade bug repellent from non-toxic ingredients, saving your kids from carcinogens like DEET and the planet from harmful ozone-depleting gases and chemicals.

• ACTIVISM
  Write letters to local politicians and representatives about environmental issues close to your family's heart and values, either locally or nationally.

• OBSERVE
  Have kids start a nature journal, and take nature walks and hikes to learn about wildlife and natural habitats in your area.

• CARBON FOOTPRINTS
  Calculate your family's impact on the environment, and learn about ways you can make big environmental changes through little lifestyle ones.

• ALL-NATURAL FOOD
  Host an all-natural or organic bake sale to raise money for your favorite "green" charity or environmental cause. Or, if you want to start at home with more natural food, create an "organic test kitchen" with your kids, and swap out one food or snack item each week with one that's organic--making it a science experiment. Did they taste the difference? Compare nutrition labels and talk about ingredients.

• DETOX YOUR HOME
  Gather up all the hazardous chemicals in your house and switch to organic or non-toxic cleansers, or make your own! Also, you may want to wean off the plastic sippy cups, bowls, plates, and storage containers you've accumulated over the years. Many of these may contain dangerous PVC and phthalate softening agents, and the ones that don't may nevertheless have trace amounts of endocrine disrupters, all of which are harmful to your family's health.

• GREEN BOOKS & BLOGS
  For more ways to explain and introduce kids to environmentalism, grab a copy of The Down-to-Earth Guide To Global Warming, from the team behind Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth, or 50 Simple Things Kids Can Do to Save the Earth, that you can read as a family, or encourage your kids to sign up for and get involved with PBS Kids' Zoom Team. I also found a fantastic blog to check out called The Green Guide for Kids you should check out and bookmark.

What are your favorite ways to teach your kids about going "green"? Share them with the Care.com community by posting a comment!

One of the fun parts about running a company that matches families with the best possible care providers is hearing the success stories from both sides and getting positive feedback about our service.

Earlier this spring, we recruited dozens of women—both working and stay-at-home moms—to join Care.com as a screening committee, judging the quality of our providers and serving as a gauntlet of sorts, deciding who gets to be a Care.com babysitter, nanny, home health aide, pet sitter, tutor or housekeeper.

We call them our MomForce, and they certainly are a force to be reckoned with!

These ambitious and passionate women carefully review each and every profile, and work with the individual providers to enhance their pages and standing within our service, also helping them to fill any gaps in their listed experience, qualifications, or references.

At Care.com, it's our mission to provide members with the best possible child care, elder care, educational help, pet care, and home care, and we couldn't fulfill this mission without the dedication and commitment of our Mom Force.

It's with great pleasure that I introduce you to just a small fraction of this powerful team.

Read on to meet the Care.com Mom Force and hear their stories!

- - - - - - 

Petra Gianopoulos-Wise

As a stay-at-home mom to a beautiful daughter and stepson, nothing is more important to me than the care of my children! I have a bachelor's degree in Communications and worked in a publishing company as an editor for two years, before deciding to go back to school to become a massage therapist. Working in an office just wasn't for me.  Plus, I wanted to be able to stay home with my stepson, of whom we have full custody, as well as have the ability to have more children.

When my daughter came along in 2006, I was doing massage therapy and freelance editing, but I really just wanted to be able to be home more with the kids.  After searching every avenue I could think of for a job that I could do at home, I finally found Care.com!  It was such a relief to find something I could do that I enjoyed from my home, so I could be with my children.  There are few companies out there like Care.com that you can feel really proud to work for.  It really is a company I can get behind.  And I have used its services myself, so I know that it is a service I can honestly endorse!

I am thrilled to be a part of the Care.com team, helping other families with their care needs, as well as being able to spend quality time with my own!

- - - - - -

Kathleen Ryan

I am a stay-at-home mother and wife to my wonderful husband, Jack.  After graduating from college in 1991, I landed my first job in the banking industry.  In 1997, we bought our first house and soon after my daughter Emily arrived. Financially, I needed to work and enjoyed my job.  As a systems analyst, my supervisor was very supportive in allowing me to work from home three days a week, while my younger sister provided care for my daughter on the other two days.

In 2000, I decided it was time to stay at home to support my growing family, and my son Jack was born in 2001. As time went on, I desperately wanted to use my knowledge and skills and finally work again! Thanks to Care.com, I was given that opportunity. On a daily basis, I'm able to assist with reviewing provider profiles—which gives me the flexibility to work from home and take care of my family. What a great company to be a part of!

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Eileen Messinger

In September 2007, my triplet boys went off to kindergarten and I became a member of Care.com's Mom Force. As a mother of three rambunctious boys, a dog, a cat, and even a messy house, I review each profile as if I were looking for a provider myself.  I am happy to report I have come across many qualified providers!

Working at Care.com is a wonderful experience.  There is such camaraderie and the flexibility they offer keeps me available for my number one job as a mother!  Though I’m lucky to have family close by and a terrific babysitter right next door, I now know exactly where to go if I find myself in need of a quality care provider.

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Rachel Rottersman

I left the paid workforce when my second child was born. I found it difficult to give both my professional life and my home life the attention they deserved.

Now that my kids are in school, I have more time and energy to devote to other pursuits. I'm thrilled to have found a job with the Mom Force that allows me to rejoin the workforce while remaining available for my children.

It's even better knowing that what we do at Care.com enables more parents to work and play knowing that their loved ones are well cared for!

- - - - - -

Do you have any questions for me or the MomForce about how we screen our Care.com providers? Post a comment and let us know your thoughts!